Polar Bear Photographs Could Get Up to A Million at Auction

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The art world is all abuzz today about the photography of a polar bear in the Arctic Circle and his pictures that could actually reach a million dollars when they are sold at Sotheby’s in NYC this weekend, making the bear one of the highest paid animal photographers.

This all started when a Danish adventurer named Waer Delicios, left his Canon EOS 7D camera worth over $2000, sitting in the arctic with no one to find it or him, at least for awhile. It seems that he disappeared without a trace, although experts say that he probably fell through the shelf of ice and was eaten by a waiting polar bear. The particular carving found around the spot appeared to have come from bear claws, but that could not be confirmed. At either rate, it seemed like an inside job, as another bear, who also had been known for stealing high end camera equipment, but eating it was in the vicinity. Frosty, however, wasn’t interested in a snack, only what the camera could do. He had a pension for taking photographs and putting them up on Facebook under the code name, “Berry Sweet” While other bears shunned him, according to his status, he was not going to be stopped by the haters and thanked the Coca-Cola bears for giving him some support.

The most coherent and meaningful photo from the auction lot has to be “Self Portrait” which shows his inner cub, playing with the camera. This one made art critics drool and one even called his work the most beautiful one he’d ever seen from an animal. And because of this wonderous artist and the fame shined on him through social media, his work is expected to get at least a million when it comes up for auction. His manager says that he is not interested in the cash, except to help his fellow bears held in captivity at Sea World and other places, oh and plenty of fish.

The bear’s next photo series is said to be entitled “Tipped Over World”, which we are looking forward to with baited breath, salmon even.

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Posted in Animals, Weird

New Firefox Extension Lets You Connect to Dead Sites

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Remember all those old sites that you used to enjoy that just aren’t there anymore? While some of those can still be found on Google’s archives, wouldn’t it be great to be able to go back in time and see them again? Well now you can with a new extension for Firefox called the T.A.R.D.I.S., the Translating Alternate Recovery Digging up Interesting Sites.

Who among us can say that they don’t miss seeing those wonderful works of art on GeoCities? Some of those took creativity and ugliness to new heights, but did so in that cool 1960’s epileptic seizure inducing goodness. But with this new extension, we don’t have to miss them. Everything is back the way it was. It’s like going back in time or something, without the Delorean and the 1.2 gigawatts of power needed. In the modern age of more streamline and “clean” sites like Facebook, seeing these again was a sight for sore eyes, or maybe a site that made our eyes sore.

You simply enter the year that you want to go back to and your browser will only be able to pull up whatever was around then. Looking for Google back in the early 1990’s? Forgot it. Wasn’t here yet. But you do have Yahoo (excuse me, akebono.stanford.edu), which tried at one point, to document sites by accepting them one at a time, rather than through the spider method employed today. Imagine doing that by hand. Course getting listed on Yahoo was quite a challenge even back then, but once you did, you had it made in the shade. That is until their directory pretty much went the way of the dodo birds.

To get the extension, you have to be able to log into their server, which requires not only a T.A.R.D.I.S. key, but a picture of yourself in bow tie and tweed, and a hot companion hanging on your shoulder, preferably with red hair and green eyes, and the entire map of the universe in your brain. There will be questions. But if you succeed, imagine the possibilities. Oh, and one more thing. The developers also require Paypal donations of $20,000,000,000.

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Posted in Internet, Weird

State Farm Introduces Zombie Insurance

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The other day I was just checking my mail when I got this interesting envelope that showed a picture of a zombie and the caption “Could this be you?” I gasped and muttered under my breath, “I certainly hope not.” I will admit the ploy made me curious. So I opened it up, half expecting some biological agent to jump out at me, but instead found a form to fill out for State Farm Zombie Insurance. Read more ›

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Posted in Health, Life, Medical, Weird

Dog Rips Up Winning Lottery Ticket

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Forget the Mega-Millions for a second and let’s feel a bit sorry for Boris Carthos, a Florida native, who had a little bit of bad luck recently when he won Florida’s own lottery worth $9 million dollars. They say that winning can ruin your life, but Carthos didn’t have the chance to find out, because instead of the dog eating his homework, the canine ate his ticket.

Boris didn’t even know he had won anything because he was in Orlando, at his company’s annual meeting, where he found out that he was most likely being laid off. Afterwards, he sulked back to his $20 a night motel to drown his sorrows in some liquor, when he got the call. At first, given the amount of excitement in his buddy’s voice, he thought that something was horribly wrong, but when he told him that he’d won the lottery, Carthos couldn’t believe it. He jumped up and down, raised a ruckus, so much so that police were called, but they let him go with a warning to keep it down, so he celebrated in silence. After all, it was $9 MILLION and he was the lone winner. He told his friend to put the ticket in the drawer and don’t tell anyone else, that he would be home shortly.

But when he arrived, he was disgusted at what he saw. Bob, his neighbor and long time friend, was gone and the dog was all alone. Because his Silky Terrier suffers from separation anxiety, like most of his kind do, he got overly excited and started ripping up papers, even pulling some from the drawer, including the lottery ticket, that Boris found a piece of still in the dog’s teeth. He sat there heart broken, being so close and now so far. He hopes that maybe he could show this small piece to someone and they would be able to track it somehow, but since it only had a single number out of the six required, it wasn’t likely.

He did say that he would never forgive his friend for leaving, but also said that he hasn’t seen him and was a bit worried that something might have happened to him. We’re sure he’ll turn up.

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Posted in Animals, Life

College Teaches Course on Partying and Drinking

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When I went to college, which was a haze, I think it would have been good if someone taught me the proper etiquette of tequila shots, toga parties and beer keggers, rather than me finding out for myself in a drunken stupor that would have wound up on Facebook if it had been available then. And so, I got a kick out of hearing the story about how one college plans to do just that with their new scheduled class “Party and Drinking 101”

The University of Texas, listed as the 2012’s top party school, certainly has alumni who know all about the practice of hanging over balconies, licking tequila from a drunk girl’s stomach, and whatever goes on behind closed doors (and sometimes open ones as well) that we can’t really discuss here. So there was no shortage of talented people that applied to teach the course, but they finally settled on Barney “Big Bob” Benza. He was famous for hanging his undershorts on the campus flagpole, assaulting a campus guard, belly flops in the pool, drinking an entire kegger by himself and getting just about every girl he could find. At first, college officials were a bit worried he might be too overqualified for the position, but Benza said he would tone it down and not mention the flagpole incident.

Dean Martin, who is the dean of student life, says that he is glad to see that the course is being added. Even if it does promote bad behavior, like the critics of the program proclaim, at least it will teach the many kids who know nothing about the party life upon arriving to avoid possible embarrassing situations that could get them barred or scorned by their fellow students. Like the kid who thought it would be funny to pee in the punch bowl at a fraternity party. Martin says if the clueless newbie had just taken the course, he would have known that such things are pretty much frowned upon. The dean then pondered for over 10 minutes whether it was good etiquette to go visit the poor lad in the hospital, where he is recovering from a full body pounding. We didn’t bother him further.

The course will begin in the fall 2012 semester and organizers say that it should fill up quickly, so students who are interested in learning the proper way to get completely wasted should hurry if they want a spot.

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Posted in Life

Batman Stopped by Police

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It was a good thing that in Gotham City, Batman had the support of the local law enforcement, because he was often seen speeding in his Batmobile to rescue some poor children from a burning bus or trying to stop the Joker from being up to mischief. Read more ›

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Posted in Life, Weird

Zebra Sticks Head in Car, Steals Man’s iPhone

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A man was just sitting in a wooded area waiting for his wife to get back from the outdoor bathrooms when he got a surprise. A zebra reached its head into his car and grabbed the smartphone, scaring the heck out of him. His wife returned to find him visually shaken in the passenger seat. But her sympathy turned to anger when he told her what had happened. She just gave him that look that women do, thinking he was just afraid to tell her that he forget her phone at the restaurant 75 miles back. Read more ›

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Posted in Animals

Man’s Head Explodes After Dumb Conversation

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We’ve heard of spontaneous combustion, but a man in New York is the first documented case of a political conversation causing his actual head to explode.

It all started, witnesses say, when the man was sitting in the restaurant with three lovely ladies and the talk turned to the dreaded topic, the presidential race. For the first five minutes, Robert Reynolds was perfectly fine, drinking champagne celebrating that he was actually having lunch with three ladies. Read more ›

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Posted in Health, Politics

Cave Painting Resembles Apple iPad

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Archaeologists in Spain have stumbled upon a new cave painting that could literally change the way we see prehistoric man and how he learned about fire.

The work, which focuses on a cave family are all sitting around waiting for their father to start a fire. He seems to be having trouble, but is looking down at what appears to be some sort of tablet with the lighter rock above it making it appear as though it is illuminated. Kind of like an iPad. But obviously the iPad isn’t nearly as old as the 30,000 years that carbon dating suggests this art is, and so it has scientists around the world baffled.

But not Fred Frozid, who runs the UFO Research Center and Gift Shop in Roswell, New Mexico. He suspects that the little grey aliens, perhaps not unlike those that had crashed nearby, have been coming to the planet for thousands of years and have helped mankind to evolve when needed. Early man could have possibly been shown how to make fire on the visual device, perhaps from a future YouTube video, thus spawning what was the start of modern civilization. Furthermore, he reasons that it’s possible that this cave dweller was an ancestor of Steve Jobs and had passed down the information through dreams about the tablet that led them out of the darkness. Frozid also says similar situations have been thought to have occured such as when an alien dropped an apple on Sir Isaac Newton’s head and Edison’s invention of the lightbulb. The extraterrestrial historian then said not to even get him started on what Tesla might have learned from these guys.

While other paintings in France have depicted what might be a UFO, the theory isn’t as crazy as it sounds. Either way, the discovery is something that archaologists will be arguing over for a long, long time.

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Posted in Life, Weird

Killer Whale Eats Penguin Display

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An orca, ironically named Batman after the superhero, swam into the Penguin Enclosure at WetWorld Tuesday morning, where he started eating his way through the population and the park’s newest zoological display.

While killer whales are generally not dangerous to humans, unless they get really mad about being in captivity, they do enjoy the bite size morsels that penguins can provide. And so it was a truly tragic moment when the gate between the two enclosures was left open by a maintenance worker. With nothing to stop the aquatic mammal from his favorite food, Batman decided not to fight the penguins, but started pushing against the ice, waiting for them to fall into his mouth like skittles. Whales don’t actually bite and chew the food like humans do, so each penguin pretty much slid down his gullet alive.

PETA (the People for Eating Tasty Animals) were disgusted by the news, mainly because penguins generally taste awful and so how a whale could stomach them was beyond their comprehension. The other PETA, you know the one, had no comment, but we’re sure the park will hear from them soon.

Meanwhile WetWorld will stop selling the Penguin Pops at their lunch counters and will hold the ball that the whales jump up to at half mast to honor those that fell into the big gaping mouth of death.

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Posted in Animals